Thursday, September 11, 2008

I need prayers and strength

Things haven't been going well for me and W lately. He's very short with me, ALL THE TIME, doesn't really show affection very much, NEVER offers emotional support if I'm sad or just had a bad day, he's NEVER happy it seems, and I don't think he wants to be married anymore. :( We're both under ALOT of stress lately because we're both in difficult educational programs, I'm in pharmacy and he's in nursing so time and money are scarce at times. I don't know what to do. He said his main two problems are 1.) that I'm a messy person (and I am) and I don't clean enough and 2.) I don't fufill his sexual needs. I admit that I'm messy, but it has a lot to do with me being so busy at school and I do work still also. And about fufilling his sexual needs, I admit I am lacking in that area, I just don't have the same needs he does at this point in my life with so much going on at school. The difference between us is that I'm STILL HAPPY, but he seems to be NEVER HAPPY. He also admitting to me the other day that he doesn't feel he'll EVER want to have children, which is something I MOST DEFINATELY want. I don't know what to do. I need prayers that we'll be ok, I don't want a divorce, but I can't go through my whole entire life with someone who is NEVER pleasant around me and never shows me affection and love and his always mad at me. Also these past few weeks I've been without a car so he's been driving me around and he's really unhappy about it. He hates it and it just makes me feel twice as bad. I don't know what to do.


Mommy to those Special Ks said...

Oh Steph, I am so sorry you're having such a hard time. Marriage is HARD. Really HARD. The first few years of our marriage sucked. Seriously. We had the SAME fights... over the mess, over money, over sex. Over and over and over. *sigh*
The huge red flag to me is the child thing. I would have been frantic if Frank said he didn't want kids. Did you guys not talk about this before you got married? (Not accusing, just asking.)

Would he agree to counselling (you know, in all your spare time!)? It's so hard when one partner is unhappy and the other one spends all his/her time trying to fix it.

Here, read these posts...
Top 7 Needs of a Wife

Top 6 Needs of a Husband

5 Obstacles to Having a Great Marriage

and most importantly:
Do you need to write a letter?

I hope these help... and know we're praying for you both.